Someone once asked me why I had stayed with Keep Fremont Beautiful for such a long time. I answered with a rather flippant remark about having never found a good time to quit. The person was genuinely surprised and said “Oh – I thought it was your passion.” Until that very moment, I hadn’t thought of KFB as my “passion” but it truly had been.  
            I was eating, sleeping, breathing Keep Fremont Beautiful for decades. How many times had I called it “My Baby”? Too many times to count. I had invested a lot of myself into the program and yes, it is true that I never did find a good time to quit. Oh, there were times that I was frustrated but I didn’t really want to quit. KFB was a continuing story, my story, and I wanted to see how it ended.
            Luckily it didn’t exactly end. I had a couple of health scares and I knew it was time to find a replacement – retirement was on the horizon. We found a great replacement and I stayed on part-time to advise. It was a pleasant transition and I was able to ease out slowly.  
            My shed was complete, I was writing daily and enjoying the additional free time to plod away on the computer. I began writing with no rhyme or reason. I just hoped that at some point all that writing would make sense.
            During this transition time at KFB, I told the new Executive Director about the story I had made up for Rai. She encouraged me to create a children’s book. I thought that was funny – I didn’t know what I was writing but I didn’t think that I was a children’s author. I wrote the story down anyway and kept it on the back burner along with dozens of other essays.
            Also, during this transition time at KFB my little granddaughter Gracyn was diagnosed with Muscular Dystrophy. Gracyn had always been a tiny little thing and we worried so about her lack of strength.  She had difficulty holding up her head and never was able to crawl. She was growing but she was not growing as she should.  
            Visits to the specialists were not helpful. My daughter Sara was not satisfied with the answers or more correctly lack of answers she was receiving from all the Doctor visits. Eventually insurance approved genetic testing. Early tests had indicated that she didn’t have muscular dystrophy, but we had misunderstood the information. That early test simply ruled out Duchenne Muscular Dystrophy and we hadn’t realized that there were so many other forms of the disease.   
            Further visits and a continuing lack of information was the norm – months passed. Gracyn wasn’t gaining weight. Sara however, was a tower of strength and advocated for her little girl. Eventually, insurance agreed to conduct more genetic testing. This time the diagnosis was confirmed as a form of muscular dystrophy. The diagnosis isn’t exactly Limb-girdle but it is presenting itself as that in Gracyn. There is no cure and it is progressive.
            Before the diagnosis, Gracyn learned to walk. Since the diagnosis, she has grown taller but her muscles have not kept up. Gracyn falls often and tires easily. She has leg braces and those do help. She is a beautiful little girl and she is a fighter. She is taking dance lessons and doing her very best. She named me Oma early on and it stuck. For her, I have always been Oma Sue.
            This brings me back to the children’s story. When I was thinking of Freddy as the little girl frog in the story, I was thinking of empowering RaiLee. I wanted Rai to know that girls are smart, capable and can accomplish anything. I wanted her to know that girls can be leaders. Girls can be effective managers and develop problem solving skills. I wanted RaiLee to know that she is a “Freddy”.
            When I saw the painting of Freddy, I immediately loved her. Anthony Brown had captured the contemplative charm, the humor, the kindness, the warmth and the strength of what I imagined Freddy to possess. Freddy was tiny but she was formidable. As I gazed at my sweet Freddy, I thought of the caption in Gracyn’s room – “Though she be but little – she is fierce."
            In moving on to this long desired retired writing adventure, I have found that clean and green communities is just a portion of my passion. Empowering girls to reach their full potential and gender equality is a major component in the three-frog series.   
            I see both of my granddaughters in Freddy. Life will have its challenges. No one ever said it was going to be easy and adjustments are always warranted. The journey ahead for Gracyn involves muscular dystrophy. Her journey will most certainly be a little bit more difficult and adjustments will be made. 
            My “passion” has grown to include preparing for Gracyn’s future needs. The sale of each book and the proceeds from the merchandise on the Oma Publishing website, funds a special needs trust for Gracyn. I hope that you will purchase a book. 
            I also hope that you will research the Muscular Dystrophy Association and consider a donation to their organization. Finding a cure would be absolutely wonderful for so many who suffer from this progressive disease.
            ​My message to RaiLee, Gracyn and all the little kids around the world, I want you to remember that you have everything inside of you to get through anything.  Though you be but little – you are fierce!   (and thank you William Shakespeare for the quote)

​            My friend Leila, who happens to be the current executive director of Keep Fremont Beautiful, stops by the house every so often, to visit about the organization and to get caught up on what is happening in our lives.    
            Her most recent visit happened just a few days after I had gone to my oldest daughters’ home for my birthday dinner celebration.  I had taken a ton of pictures and videos of the decorations and the family.  Our little Gracyn had entertained us throughout the evening with jokes and singing – she is quite the performer.
            Gracyn is my granddaughter who has muscular dystrophy.  Gracyn is beautiful, intelligent, talented, funny and fierce.  Leila was appropriately smitten with the videos of my adorable little granddaughter, as well as, the numerous pictures of the other magnificent grandchildren and the evenings activities.  
            Of course, the conversation led to topics concerning the sale of the book, the setting up of the special needs trust for Gracyn, creating the website for Oma Publishing and the writing and illustrating of the second book.  There was a lot to get her caught up on.
            I can’t remember exactly how the conversation went, but as it was winding down, Leila stated that she had never known my husband Randy but she imagined that I wished he was here to experience all of this with me.  
              I paused for a moment before answering Leila…  “I feel that he is here.  He is with me.”
 
            For those of you who don’t know, my husband Randy passed away in 2006 from brain cancer.  I have often talked to Leila about Randy and what a special man he was to me and our children.  I have told her stories of his strength, his wit and his intelligence. The man was a wonderful and loving person.  I miss him and always will but at the same time, I know he is here.
            During the last few weeks of Randy’s life, he entered hospice care.  It was much too difficult to provide the needed care for Randy in our home so we opted for a medical facility a few blocks from our house.  I had my son-in-law move our recliner into Randy’s room so I could stay with him day and night.  I rarely left his side as he slowly slipped away from me.    
             One day my Mom came in to the room.  She stood at the end of his bed.  I stood beside the bed.  I looked down and saw that Randy’s hand was resting on his chest.  I giggled because he was giving me the finger.  I didn’t think he would respond but I jokingly said “Hey Randy, you are giving my Mom the finger.”  He opened his eyes, raised his head to look at my Mom, picked up his hand and with a bit of a smirk gave my Mom a proper finger.  
            ​It was like – Hey how many times do I have left to give my mother-in-law the finger?  Mom and I both laughed as he rested once again. 
            Our oldest daughter Sara was pregnant during this time of hospice for Randy.  She would come visit and sit by his bed – his hand resting on her baby bump.  He had told her he would live to hold his grandson. He had told me that he would beat the cancer inside his head.  We were heart broken as the cancer continued to take its toll.  
             I prayed, I cried and I worried during those days in hospice.  I told Randy over and over how much I loved him and how I knew that he would be watching over us.  I pleaded with him to give me a sign so I would know that he was with me after he was gone.  
            On January 31st, I nodded off to sleep holding Randy’s hand through the guard rail.  I awoke suddenly with a warm sensation throughout my body, I couldn’t move, the warmth faded, the paralysis ended and I knew that Randy had passed on.   I appreciated the warm good-bye and hoped that I would receive a sign of his presence in the future.  
            That was in January of 2006.  Fast forward to April of 2006 and the birth of our first grandchild. Sara had wanted me in the delivery room and I was so honored to be present for the birth of dear Sam.  I was so completely delighted to get to hold that precious boy just moments after his birth.  As I gazed at his adorable little smirk, he laid his hand on his chest and gave me the finger. At that moment I realized that Randy was with us – all of us.  We were surrounded by the love of the most special man I have ever known.  
            Yes, Randy could be a tad irreverent but it was a perfect sign and I know he is with me still.